In most cases, a child is considered a great blessing. However, at some point, you might find giving up your baby for adoption as the only option, considering your prevailing situation. Unlike the common misconception that placing a child for adoption is a selfish act of giving up on your baby, it’s actually giving a good life to that little soul. In as much as you’d want to raise your child on your own, some circumstances might prompt you to look for ways of giving your baby up for adoption at birth or later, in pursuit of trying to see that the child gets a better life than you can offer.

Reasons for Giving a Child Up for Adoption

• Financial Stability: From health insurance premiums, food and shelter to luxuries, raising a child is not a walk in the park—you need money (maybe lots of it) to ensure that you meet these needs, among others. If your finances are so minimal that you can’t cater for them, you can consider giving out your child to a person who can provide the child with what he/she will need as she grows up.
• Untimely Pregnancy: A child conceived accidentally after consented sex or rape might leave a woman feeling like her dreams have been shattered. In extreme circumstances, the presence of such kids (especially those resulting from rape incidences) in their mothers’ lives may take a toll on the women. This is because they may be a constant reminder of the nasty ordeals their mothers underwent, leading to the untimely pregnancies. If, as a mother, you feel that you won’t be able to accept such a child in your life, giving him or her up for adoption might be the best decision for both of you.
• Unreadiness to Be a Single Parent: It’s not uncommon to find a single parent who’s able to raise their child on their own and they are quite comfortable with their single parenthood. However, some biological mothers feel inadequate to raise their children by themselves if the fathers they sired with aren’t willing or available to assist them with parenting. If you find yourself there, don’t stress yourself to death. Your peace of mind is very important and giving your child up for adoption might help you live at peace knowing that you won’t have parental commitments that you aren’t willing to fulfill. Fortunately, there’s someone out there who’s willing to step in, assume the parental roles, thereby helping you to have the freedom you need to pursue your dreams.
• Health Issues: Some health problems can prevent you from being an ideal parent for your child. Whether it’s a seemingly self-inflicted issue, for instance, drug addiction, or a disease resulting from a natural cause, you don’t have to see your child suffer due to your inability to provide a good life to him/her. If you feel that your health issue can’t allow you to provide him or her with a stable home environment and reasonably good standard of living, you can opt to have the kid placed in a family that can take care of him/her better than the way you can.
• Abusive Spouse: Domestic violence can be hurtful not only to a spouse (a husband or wife) but can also have adverse effects on the life of a child brought up in a violent family. In most cases, women and children are victims of domestic violence. To protect their child from the repercussions of a violent home environment, a biological mother or father can make the right decision of placing their child for adoption as they try to save themselves from the toxic relationship.
• Religious or Societal Beliefs: In some societies and religions, having a child out of wedlock is seen as a taboo. In such cases, women who find themselves having babies outside a marriage relationship experience stigma and shame and in some cases, they even risk being excommunicated from religious functions or their families. The baby experiences the negativity as well. To avoid all this, the best decision could be to give out the child for adoption.

There are many more things that can make a biological parent want to have their child raised by adoptive parents. Whichever the case, no one should make you feel like you are doing a bad thing by giving a child up for adoption. As long as the decision will ultimately make you happy and it’s for the best interest of the child, don’t pay attention to naysayers. You are the author of your life. Most likely, you’ll at some point in life look back and say to yourself, “Yes, that was the best decision. I’m happy. My child has a better life than I could afford to provide.”

Steps to Give Up a Baby for Adoption

1. Establish if Adoption is the Best Thing for You and Your Kid: A child is a precious gift. Even if your baby is yet to be born, the bond between you is still strong and letting someone else instead of you become part of the child’s life won’t be easy at all. In some cases, parents act on the spur of the moment only to regret their decisions later. Maybe you just lost your job and you feel as if you won’t be able to cater for the needs of your child, only to land a good job sooner than you had expected but when you’ve already given up your child to adoptive parents. That’s the time you are likely to find yourself wishing you were a little bit more patient and had the baby with you.
2. Establish How You’d Want Your Child Put Up for Adoption: You are the chief decision-maker as far as the adoption of your child is concerned. Remember that you are doing this not necessarily for your convenience, but for the welfare of the child. Although your presence won’t be much in the child’s life once the adoptive parents take charge, the decisions you make while making the adoption plan will forever influence the life of the kid. So, before you sign any papers related to the adoption process, ensure that the decisions you’ll make will be for the best interest of the child. Make sure that you are comfortable with the elements of the plan so that you don’t look back and regret your decision in the future.
3. Identify the Ideal Family for Your Kid: There are hundreds of families who might be waiting to adopt a child like yours. However, these families are different in terms of cultures, family size, religious background, financial stability, and personalities, among other factors. While some might be the best your child can find, others can be a pain in the flesh in your child’s life. As such, you need to take your time and get to understand different prospective adoptive families to establish the best, depending on your child’s needs as well as your personal preferences.
4. Familiarize Yourself with the Family That’s About to Take in the Child: As a parent, you have a right to know where your child will live should the adoption process be successful. Nowadays, the child adoption process is more open like never before. You are allowed to make a pre-placement contact with the adoptive family before concluding the adoption process to help you know almost everything you’d want to know about them to establish if your child will be in safe hands.
5. Giving Baby Up for Adoption at Birth and Fulfilling the Other Legal Adoption Requirements: Now, having identified the best adoptive family for your child, it’s time to actualize the adoption process. In case you are pregnant with the child you are planning to put on adoption, it’s crucial to come up with a hospital plan. The adoption specialist that we assign to you can help you in the creation of the plan.

After-Adoption Relationship

The end of the adoption process is marked by your adoption consent in the form of signing. Once you sign the consent form, your child will be officially adopted by the new family.

However, unlike in some past years, when adoptions meant “forever goodbye” between a biological mother and her child, nowadays, you can continue to keep contact with your child even after adoption. However, you need to discuss this early enough with the adoptive family to come to a common ground regarding your continued contact with the child.

Some of the options you have to continue being a participant in your child’s life after adoption include receiving picture updates or letter updates regarding the kid for a certain period—most women who are giving kids up for adoption choose 18 years. Also, you can choose to maintain contact with the family via personal visits, emails, text messages, and/or social media.

Basically, those are major steps on how to put a kid up for adoption. We hope that you are now more enlightened about the process and can make a more informed decision regarding the life of your child. Don’t hesitate to contact us in case you need further clarification in respect to the subject matter.